Friday, 30 March 2012

What to do when everything falls apart - whinge.

Sorry for the sparky post title but I just need a free-flow rant.

I am getting married in three weeks tomorrow.

I should be excited right?

Well I am not.

My original wedding was meant to be by the sea in Cornwall. It is near where I grew up and I loved it. But everyone complained about how far it was and how unfair to expect people to I changed that wedding plan completely. I changed it to a place near where we live. I like that place but it isn't in any way special like the other place. Not to worry, I can make it special with the music and the people I want there, right?


I had to invite tons more people than I wanted. I am not happy about that but it is what everyone else wants, so I smile and say ok and think, I can make that special by wearing something that makes me feel more comfortable and less nervous in front of all those people, right?

No, because of my stupid boobs. I have tried and bought three (cheap) dresses now and they all look awful. I have no dress..not to worry, I will find one in three weeks and my chest will somehow shrink in least I have a nice hen night to go to this weekend, right?

No. my hen night would've been nice but everyone (apart from two friends and mother and two sister-in-laws) has bailed on me. one is preggo and feels ill, one is working her first day at a new job, one is having her hair done for a wedding, one is having a sad family situation (that one is fair enough) and the other 9 people I invited didn't even bother to reply, not to the invite, the reminder nor the personal email. so, I cancelled it...never mind, I have my lovely wedding reception by the river to look forward to right?

No. because the venue I was going to have it in emailed me yesterday with THREE weeks left and told me they had to cancel.



So, I have no dress, no hen night, no anything I need for a wedding reception. No money as I have lost it all in deposits and can't change the dates..and a heavy heart.

Without being a total (excuse the language) selfish twat about it..why do these sort-of things always happen to me? I feel like I am being TESTED.

I know it could be worse, there are many more things in this world to be upset about and I know I am being selfish and pathetic and it doesn't matter and I WILL make it a nice day, I know all of that, it will be ok..BUT, just for now, in a really shallow, selfish way. I feel gutted, and sad, and friendless and let down.

WHAT THE EFF am I going to do?


rant over


  1. Oh (excuse the language) shit shit shit. What a massive shitter. (This situation calls for such language.)

    Although I've not been through this situation (what a freaky coincidence if I had!) I know the feelings you are describing well. And it doesn't sound to me like you're being selfish and pathetic. It sounds to me like you are quite rightly, quite justifiably, pissed off.

    I wonder though....does this now leave you free to arrange something that suits you far better?.....i.e.. to say 'sod it, we're going to Cornwall, we're having fish and chips on the beach, and those of you who want to come would be very welcome' (definitely describing my idea of a perfect wedding celebration here....!). Could you maybe end up having much more fun now than when you had a whole load of people coming to a place that you weren't in love with?

    I know it doesn't always work like that, sometimes you have to do things in a certain way, but wouldn't it be brilliant if this ended up meaning that out of your currently crappy situation, something lovely could present itself. (I must admit that if it was me, I would be in a MASSIVE grump right now so I hope it's not incredibly irritating to have a 'hey, let's turn this into something positive' suggestion made...)

    Fingers crossed for you that you and your chap (and your children) get to enjoy your day properly together. You are the important ones.

    Vanessa x

  2. Vanessa, thank you so much for your sweet words. They meant the world to me. We had to go ahead with our stag and hen nights together in the end. It was disasterous, ended in me being told to go home by the boys, apparently I wasn't welcome on my own stag/hen night,the men didn't want me my own hen night.nice. That was the last nail in the coffin for me. I am not sure where my future is going from now but I am reeling and just shell shocked. It's caused a whole huge fall out and my relationship now hangs in the balance..Aren't people mean sometimes. Oh well,I am very grateful for your kind words. They mean so much. Thank you xx

    1. I have been a bit off the radar for the last week or so, so have just seen your reply here. What a huge, upsetting let down, I am so, so sorry that your hen night turned out in this way.

      I hope that you've been able to sort things out together. It's difficult to respond in writing to something like this as of course in reality I would be releasing a torrent of swear words...a lot of effing and jeffing is often helpful in a dire situation I find.

      I will refrain from making a comment about the wierd creatures that are known as 'men'. I know they have their good sides but sometimes they are bloody idiots. (I know women can be too, but it sounds like on this particular night, following on from the let down of friends forgetting their manners, the men were the ones who needed to get a grip and have words with themselves...)

      I hope you've been able to sort things out - it sounds like you've been under a lot of pressure and that this particular night was the icing on the crap-cake, but I really hope that it's all starting to feel like a bit of a distant horrible memory.


  3. It was the biggest crap cake with crappola icing deluxe!.. but, I decided that I shant let that idiot and his followers bring me down. I have lovely lady friends in my life and that makes me feel lucky. Be those lady friends around me in real life or lovely lady blog friends like you being strong for me here! So THANK you for your lovely words :) xx